Ladies and Gentlemen,
Mr. Maas has created another post that is related to fifth graders. In his post, he asked students from all of the Littleton High Schools to read your comments, and then respond to some of his questions. I think that you might be interested in the comments from the high school students, so here you go. Please feel free to comment here on the Dragon Pagoda, and I will collect some of your comments and use them to create one large comment to post on Dan's Blog if we get enough great thoughts to share.
I hope you are enjoying your break!
~ Mr. Moore
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Letter From Dan Maas
Dear “Powered Up Writing” Students, Teachers, and Parents,
Across LPS, we have pilot projects of ASUS EeePCs in classrooms. We hope that you are enjoying the new computers and are learning more than ever before. Many people are asking about how your classroom has changed now that you have the EeePC laptops. Can you help us tell your story?
Here are some questions we have:
How does having a laptop computer help students write better?
What happens in your classroom now that you have laptops that could not happen before?
Now that you have had laptops in your classroom, how would you feel if you didn’t have them next year?
What do next year’s 5th grade students coming to your classroom have to look forward to?
Please respond to the blog linked at the URL address below. If you are a student, please have an adult check your comment before you post.
http://inspired.littletonpublicschools.net
Please reply no later than Monday, March 23rd, 2009.
Thank you,
Monday, October 27, 2008
Feedback
Now that you have gotten feedback from a real audience, you can see what a difference there is between feedback and great feedback. When you comment on this post, please answer the following questions in complete sentences. Make sure to really share some great thinking.
1. How did you feel about the feedback you got?
2. Does this feedback help you see why it is so important to be specific?
3. Please describe the feedback you wish you received.
Here is an example answer so that you can see what kind of comments I expect:
Mr. Moore,
I did not feel good about the feedback I got because I did not really learn much. I do not think I can improve my story with the feedback I received. I can see that it is important to be specific. When people just write "nice job" it makes me feel like they really didn't have anything to say about my story. It's almost as if they didn't even listen to me when I read my piece. I know that some parents had a hard time since they didn't know what to write, and I know that some parents had a hard time writing in English, but I definitely have some ideas about the feedback I wish I received. I wish that people had written specific feedback that told me more about how to make my writing better, or told me more about what was great in my piece.
Your friend,
Johnny
Now, please go ahead and comment. Use my example as an example. Please do not just copy what I wrote. Use your own words and your own thoughts. Thanks!
~ Mr. Moore
1. How did you feel about the feedback you got?
2. Does this feedback help you see why it is so important to be specific?
3. Please describe the feedback you wish you received.
Here is an example answer so that you can see what kind of comments I expect:
Mr. Moore,
I did not feel good about the feedback I got because I did not really learn much. I do not think I can improve my story with the feedback I received. I can see that it is important to be specific. When people just write "nice job" it makes me feel like they really didn't have anything to say about my story. It's almost as if they didn't even listen to me when I read my piece. I know that some parents had a hard time since they didn't know what to write, and I know that some parents had a hard time writing in English, but I definitely have some ideas about the feedback I wish I received. I wish that people had written specific feedback that told me more about how to make my writing better, or told me more about what was great in my piece.
Your friend,
Johnny
Now, please go ahead and comment. Use my example as an example. Please do not just copy what I wrote. Use your own words and your own thoughts. Thanks!
~ Mr. Moore
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Time Travel
What is the main reason authors should use flash backs and flash forwards? Can you think of some examples of this technique in books you have read? How about in your own writing? Before you comment on this post, take some time to find a great example to share in your comment. Please do not share an example that I have already shared in class. Look at your own writing, look in your library books, or look in books around the room. As you consider your example, think to yourself does this flash back or flash forward really help to create a strong emotional connection?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Internal Stories
Our class has been talking about internal and external stories - and how great personal narratives have a bit of both. In this excerpt from Sandra Cisneros' story, Papa Who Wakes Up Tired In The Dark, which parts of the story are internal, and which are external?
Your abuelito is dead, Papa says early one morning in my room. Esta muerto, and then as if he just heard the news himself, crumples like a coat and cries, my brave papa cries. I have never seen my Papa cry and don't know what to do.
I know he will have to go away, that he will take a plane to Mexico, all the uncles and aunts will be there, and they will have a black and white photo taken in front of the tomb with flowers shaped like spears in a white vase because this is how they send the dead away in that country.
Because I am the oldest, my father has told me first, and now it is my turn to tell the others. I will have to explain why we can't play. I will have to tell them to be quiet today.
My Papa, his thick hands and thick shoes, who wakes up tired in the dark, who combs his hair with water, drinks his coffee, and is gone before we wake, today is sitting on my bed.
And I think if my own Papa died what would I do. I hold my Papa in my arms. I hold and hold and hold him.
Again, I ask: What parts of the story are internal, and what parts of the story are external? Please comment with your answers. Make sure to explain your thinking and use more than one sentence. Thanks!
~ Mr. Moore
Your abuelito is dead, Papa says early one morning in my room. Esta muerto, and then as if he just heard the news himself, crumples like a coat and cries, my brave papa cries. I have never seen my Papa cry and don't know what to do.
I know he will have to go away, that he will take a plane to Mexico, all the uncles and aunts will be there, and they will have a black and white photo taken in front of the tomb with flowers shaped like spears in a white vase because this is how they send the dead away in that country.
Because I am the oldest, my father has told me first, and now it is my turn to tell the others. I will have to explain why we can't play. I will have to tell them to be quiet today.
My Papa, his thick hands and thick shoes, who wakes up tired in the dark, who combs his hair with water, drinks his coffee, and is gone before we wake, today is sitting on my bed.
And I think if my own Papa died what would I do. I hold my Papa in my arms. I hold and hold and hold him.
Again, I ask: What parts of the story are internal, and what parts of the story are external? Please comment with your answers. Make sure to explain your thinking and use more than one sentence. Thanks!
~ Mr. Moore
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